YOUR FATHER DIED ON THE GALLOWS

Meet the legendary, extraordinary and utterly unique Joseph Slandisch!

The persecuted and tormented child, batty tone-deaf musician, wild, crazy, unpredictable Harley Street psychiatrist and tunelessly singing murderer, is loveable all the same.

Wicked but impossible to hate, he giggles, bashes and crashes on his comic path through his mad, black life of the brilliant doctor, stunning looker and lady killer, but soppy doting and indulgent father.

Love him, weep with him, laugh with him but keep your distance when he gets out his carving knife, or far, far worse than that his violin.

"A unique display of black humour which somehow fails to depress the reader."

- Craig Mc Little. The Rugby Gazette.

2nd Edition only. 1st Edition sold out!!

Translated into Russian and available all over Russia.

RRP: £5.95 (UK)

ISBN: 0 863036 596-5

Click the above link to buy this book online!
In Association with Amazon Books Online

Excerpt 1 from Your father died on the Gallows

"On the morning of his execution, he was seen by the Chaplain, the governor, the Sheriff and a doctor. On a signal from the public school educated Sheriff, Whitteridge and Evans went rapidly into Joseph's cell and tied his hands behind him.

"Is it all right if we bring my violin?"asked Joseph.

"I'm afraid not." said the Sheriff. "Not a chance."

Joseph put on a theatrical, sepulchral dirge.

"Nero fiddled while Rome burned, did he not?"

"Please don't think it my intention to insult you during the last minute of your life, but Nero was a considerably more accomplished musician than your own good self."

Joseph was escorted to the scaffold with an officer on either side of him. While Whitteridge put the white cap on Joseph's head, Evans pinioned his legs and Whitteridge pulled the lever."

Excerpt 2 from Your father died on the Gallows

"I've got a brilliant idea," said Victor. "If the Revenue approach me, I shall say this:- 'Raskolnikov, the hero of Dostoievsky's Crime and Punishment, was summoned to the police station where an officer was smoking.' Raskolnikov shouted, '"Don't you dare smoke a cigarette in front of me. I'm a student.'"

"I will say that I went to an employment agency and got talking to someone there about Dostoievsky, and repeated the words 'I am a student'. I'll say a member of staff overheard me saying "I am a student," and on hearing my words, wrote 'student', on my card, thus exempting me from full taxation. To substantiate this, I can send a photocopy of the passage from Crime and Punishment, to the Inland Revenue".

Rupert looked baffled.

"No, no, you damned maniac! You don't go writing mad letters to semi-literate tax inspectors about fucking Dostoievsky!"